A List of 27 Bad Horror Cliches Viewers Can Expect to See During ‘House at The End of the Street’

  1. Hot chicks in tight, low-cut blouses
  2. A seemingly reliable flashlight that’s suddenly prone to fits
  3. Total douchebag jocks falling victim to the bad man’s wrath
  4. Stabbing victims who do not drop an ounce of blood
  5. Stabbing/shooting victims who inexplicably leap back to life, seemingly no worse for the wear
  6. A dark house with the blinds drawn
  7. A spooky girl in a white nightgown
  8. An otherwise intelligent female lead who keeps on moving forward whenever she should be turning back
  9. A female lead who trips and falls at the worst possible moment
  10. An evil villain who explains his entire psychosis as he’s hunting down his prey in a dark, abandoned cellar
  11. A spooky neighborhood house where a local couple was once butchered to death
  12. A real-life dungeon hidden beneath a trap door in the basement floor
  13. A ridiculously long hallway that leads toward a suspicious-looking door
  14. A friendly neighborhood police officer
  15. A curious neighbor
  16. A stranger coming to town
  17. Chloroform
  18. A prevailing urban legend
  19. An inheritance
  20. People that walk into complete strangers’ houses without so much as knocking
  21. An unspeakable evil that’s been lying dormant right under the town’s nose for years, before suddenly going on a terrifying, balls-out murder spree over the course of 3-4 consecutive days
  22. A contrived attempt at creating a really heartwarming story to underlie the terror
  23. A not-so-subtle nod of the cap to several other, much better horror movies
  24. Recurring chunks of cheesy dialogue
  25. A cringe-worthy twist that three-quarters of the audience grew hip to shortly after the opening credits
  26. Major plot points that escape any and all rational thought or explanation
  27. A ridiculous ending that hints at an even worse sequel to follow

(House at The End of the Street opens in theaters nationwide today)