The Baytown Outlaws is an ultra-violent thrill ride that also happens to be a good bit of fun, assuming you’re into that type of thing. This movie has no interest in tugging at your heartstrings or making you go all gooey between the thighs. From the opening frame, Baytown‘s very honest intention is to kick the goddamned door down; to shake you and wake you from whatever Amour-induced coma you may have been suffering.

To that end, The Baytown Outlaws hits its mark. This despite the once-venerable Billy Bob Thornton masquerading about as some uber-bad-ass kingpin. I mean, don’t get me wrong. Thornton sure does sound the part. And he acts the part, as well. But he simply does not look the part, what with those steamed-vegetable arms of his, and something akin to a loose twig for a waist. This … This is not the look of a man who strikes grave fear into the hearts of his enemies, let alone a man who would just as soon kiss you as kill you.

That aside, Baytown Outlaws is a gory, gruesome, gratuitous good time – a slick little engine that hums its way straight across the Bible Belt and back again. Perfect for all those lonesome winter nights when there’s absolutely nothing else to order OnDemand.

(The Baytown Outlaws arrives for a limited engagement at New York City’s Cinema Village on January 7th, and is currently available via YouTube and VOD.)